Cincy Bengals - fishing
A guy walks into a bar with a dachshund under his arm. The dog is wearing a
Cincinnati Bengals jersey and helmet, and is festooned with Bengal pom-poms.
The bartender says, “Hey! No pets are allowed! You’ll have to leave.”
The guy begs him, “Look, I’m desperate! We’re both big fans, the TV’s
broken at home, and this is the only place around where we can see the
game.”
After securing a promise that the dog will behave, and warning him that he
and the dog will be thrown out if there’s any trouble, the bartender relents
and allows them to stay in the bar and watch the game.
The big game begins with the Bengals receiving the kickoff. They march down
field, get stopped at the 30, and kick a field goal. Suddenly, the dog
jumps up on the bar and begins walking up and down the bar giving high-fives
to everyone.
The bartender says, “Wow, that is the most amazing thing I’ve seen! What
does the dog do if they score a touchdown?”
The owner replies, “I don’t know, I’ve only had him for three years.”
=================
A game warden noticed how a particular fellow named Sam consistently caught
more fish than anyone else, whereas the other guys would only catch three or
four a day. Sam would come in off the lake with a boat full. Stringer after
stringer was always packed with freshly caught trout.
The warden, being curious, asked Sam his secret. The successful fisherman
invited the game warden to accompany him and observe. So, the next morning
the two met at the dock and took off in Sam’s boat. When they got to the
middle of the lake, Sam stopped the boat, and the warden sat back to
see how it was done. Sam’s approach was simple. He took out a stick of
dynamite, lit it, and threw it in the air.
The explosion rocked the lake with such a force that dead fish immediately
began to surface. Sam took out a net and started scooping them up.
Well, you can imagine the reaction of the game warden. When he recovered
from the shock of it all, he began yelling at Sam. “You can’t do this! I’ll
put you in jail, buddy! You will be paying every fine there is in the book!”
Sam, meanwhile, set his net down and took out another stick of dynamite. He
lit it and tossed it in the lap of the game warden with these words, “Are
you going to sit there all day complaining, or are you going to fish?”